Jesus’ supposed words have shackled me and crucified a people like me
Although he was conceived by woman and God, somehow he came out male although he is not a product of it
Americans placed him on the US dollar bill
A legendary bill that bought worldwide capitalism and gave it to the rest of the world as a Christmas present
Some were good children but the others unwrapped their present at gun point
We took the shell casings and made a crown to replace the thorns
Then we burned the presents and replaced them with credit and today was born
Capital is punishment and punishment may be capital
And hierarchies are masculine and this whole world has turned into one giant pyramid scheme
With pharaohs waving swords at the top slaughtering the women as they try to climb
Slaughtering the men who will not slaughter
Picking a destiny for those in between and treating them accordingly
The sun is burning all of them and as it rises…

Each morning my blue eyes are exposed by lifting shields
Red blooded American with a mixmatched soul and genitals
Awaking for another day where my inner eyes stare at myself
From my colored eyes whether they are brown and hard or they are black and hard
To my skin or eyebrows which will snow each day if they do not receive contact of warm water
And black grass in which is a yard unkempt by a homeowner who would be fine setting for to the entire thing
I begin all of my addictions at once and end them never but my compulsions vary
Cloth choice depends on who I am performing today, although they are all within the same purple flesh
To those to who I am unknown, which river shall you cross today? For the natives know the water well
I begin as most white canvases marked phallically do, for I am human
Like an outlaw in an inmate disguise, I peel off the superficial layers that I feel help make me who I am
I shall waste water like a good inhabitant like the rest of you waste judgment on your theories that you accept as law
Then I mow that black lawn oh so greenly of those who differ in certain biology and who do pay dearly for such a thing
That silver line you joke about then immediately dispose of is obvious
And it is okay
It disappears for the same reason that it remains apparent
Because it should be and remain forever irrelevant
But because this flesh hangs from between my legs, it will not
And as I am finished washing and drying those judgments I am dirty as I began because true cleanliness is pumped from my red heart and jaded veins
Yet I proceed to play into a hierarchical capitalistic procedure in which targets binary constructs as I pretend I am breaking them
I pretend and hope and feel and want to break them into the tiny multi-faceted rainbow multiples that are still attached that I feel they are
That I know they are and are to be if I ever hope to be a human being
However, I digress from the trivial to the core
But does all philosophy?
From theoretical to reality, it all intertwines
So here I am, painting these mirrors with a mirror so you can see my mirrors but they’re just glass to me
Don’t worry!
I used a phallus for the paint job
Watch it
Watch it
Watch it paint me feminine

So here I am, presented with two vitalities in which the world gives me as options
Do you eat or do you drink? Choose one and only one
So I will pick like it’s a fucking choice
And the passion isn’t disinginuine because see, I do love each so-called “choice” because I have a raging appetite
So I will play this game, so fresh, and enjoy every minute of it
Flirting and laughing like a good girl
I mean boy!
I mean man!
Sorry, please don’t punish me
Please don’t because it won’t change anything
Oh lady how I love thee
And I do, I do, I do
I love you because you are human
And too because you’re beautiful
And also, but not lastly, because you are a reflection of a soul that has rules you play by
I admire and have respect for your curves
Your lips like sugar
Your eyes so deep in color that are, as every great thinker and poet has claimed, a portal to your soul – whatever that means
And making love is just that plus expression and maintenance
You have the bits I love, but not all of them
I’m not that lucky
Neither are you, but I could never wish that burden upon you
I want you like no one else ever has
I want it for me
Inside me
A part of me
Not how the poets mean
But like lust over an outfit
Just like that
I wish I could put it on but all I can wear are the symbols
Simple, yet profound
That which makes me human can also be that which keeps me from being

And you can laugh at it like it’s a joke
It’s so fucking hilarious
“He thinks he’s not what we say he is!”
But all you said I was was… well I guess you said it all
And here comes the part where you show me how it’s done like intent is a measurable truth but that suffering it creates is immeasurable in itself
Yell yell yell
Blah blah blah
I know!
You don’t though
What would it cost you to believe me?
To trade in the grand hegemony so you can buy the lesser
You still have some credit left over so you can buy some fancy sunglasses or a bullet-proof vest
Why don’t I trade up?
Because those diamonds have blood inside of them

So here I am, presented with two vitalities in which the world gives me as options
Do you forever sleep or snort rock?
There is no in between
And if I choose what you consider an “alternative” what will you do?
Because love is a construct, just like anything else
Produced by society to ensure some kind of moral
Whatever God said or whatever you remember God saying
I’m sick you say
Cast my feelings aside so you can deal with the problem
So you can destroy it and put it to an end
So that it will never happen again
And as disgusted and sickened I am by this attempt, I know it is just that
Removing my heart is the only way to destroy my world
And that, you have not done

Just give it time
Time is relative, and irrelevant because there are millions before me and billions afterwards
And I know you want to come back and save me before I might save you
Our intent may be the same but the definitions vary
Lay down next to me and let us start again
Hello, my name is Chris and this is my friend
But just as I continue to want it, you continue to want me to not to want it
Don’t you see?
There is no middle ground!
My middle ground sincerely is nothing but submission
That’s all it’s ever been
Fine, fine, fine!
Strip me and redress me like you always do
This problem is shared and we know it
I’m glad you’re trying to fix that which is trying to end you, even though, again our definitions vary
I am not as strong as I wish I were but the more I lift the more strength I get
You are my weight – that which weighs me down but makes me stronger
I’m not thanking you, I’m just acknowledging it
You’re a forgery of your God and I am a sex defender and yes, an offender

My purple heart is growing whether or not it appears to wither and wane
Because I begin all my addictions at once and end them never despite every attempt to manage them in a way which will not kill me, but make me happy
Each night my blue eyes explode by weakened shields
Each night my blue eyes explode by weakened shields
Each night my blue eyes explode by weakened shields
Each night my blue eyes explode by weakened shields
Each night my blue eyes explode by weakened shields